In keeping with recent discussions of Wedding DIY, this post is from a guest blogger, Jordan Victoria.
The post appeared, originally on her blog, on March 28, 2011
Now, please Jordan’s open letter to Wedding Planners…
Wedding planners are blessed to have a career that allows one to stay passionate about as well as wallow in the glam of fabulousness when planning each wedding…as much as it is glamorous…underneath the tastings, venue walk-throughs, floral selections and champagne we actually do work…and as most of you will agree…IT IS HARD WORK!
When I think about all the work, planning, time (sleepless nights) dedication that we put into our profession and business it puzzles me as to why we have allowed the “Day of Package” to cripple the industry that we all have worked so hard to build. No thanks to the DIY craze and thousands of planning tools.
We are now faced with brides who have been brainwashed into believing that they can go from being newly engaged to waking up the next day as a “Professional Wedding Planner”.
If you needed open heart surgery, would you plan and prep your chest prior to surgery then hire a surgeon the DAY OF your surgery to perform the surgery or would you, hire him upon being diagnosed that you need to have the surgery and take his professional advice prior to and post your surgery…I think that most of you would choose the latter part.
If this is true why are we offering “Day of Coordination Packages” to brides????? Day of Coordination is NOT at all helpful to our industry; it is NOT a saving grace for your business either, put on your thinking caps for a moment, the fees that you charge for the services holds no value compared to the marketing and hard work that you have dedicated to building your brand.
If wedding planners continue to offer these (in most markets inexpensive) services it will continue to allow brides to plan majority of their weddings and only hire planners for the “Day of Coordination”, hence the reason why we MUST Kill the “Day Of Coordination Package” before it becomes the death of our industry. None of us can afford for our industry to become dependent on “Day of Coordination” services only, we have the power to guide our industry in the direction that will demand for us to continue to provide full services and retain the full credit and fees deserved behind each wedding that we attach our brand to.
Imagine the bride planning her entire wedding and the style, decor, vendors and process aren’t exactly as you would recommend nor is it anything that you would want your name, brand or face associated with, but you signed her on months ago because you were trying to reach your monthly, quarterly or yearly goal or maybe you needed more income to stay afloat…but after the 200 plus guests arrived and commented on the horrible decor, venue, vendors etc…they all turn and point to you whispering and spewing negative remarks about the tacky disaster that the “inexperienced wedding planner produced”.
Needless to say the guests has no idea that you were hired a short-time ago to only oversee the details of the ceremony and reception and you’re not at all at fault for the tackiness…but in the eyes of the guests they only see you as The Wedding Planner…and not a good one to say the least (now the 200 plus potential clients that you were banking on, to possibly retain for a future event, thinks that you SUCK as a planner). So ask yourself the question, is your reputation, brand and name more valuable than the fees received from “Day of Coordination Packages”?...
If so, this is why we can’t afford to continue to offer these blood-sucking packages. Offering this quick-service for money is a temporary solution that will become a permanent problem for our industry if we don’t dispose of it.
Now that we’ve recognized the problem of “Day of Coordination” packages let’s focus on the solution, if we all stand together and make these changes we will all continue to reap the rewards and benefits for our services. Most working brides do not have 400 plus hours to dedicate to planning their wedding, which is why our services are retained and appreciated, so why should we let a consumer dictate our future or business, we chose this industry and decided to become entrepreneurs, so we have to take the lead and run our business and industry as leaders.
Let’s band together immediately and make a “Planners Promise Pledge” to phase out “Day of” services from your menu of services to keep the demand of our industry rising and prosperous.
Please post your comments, your support and opinions are welcome.
With great hope for our industry and prosperous blessings to my fellow planners…Success!
Jordan Victoria
CCO, Chief Couture Officer
Director of Romance & Event Fashionista
Couture Cocktail Lounge Blog
Event Couture Weddings & Events
In many ways I agree with this post, although I think day of coordination could better be called Wedding Day Management. That is what I call my service package that works with the bride that has done most of the planning on their own. My services also begin 90 days before the wedding- we meet once for a planning meeting, there is a venue walkthrough and I am accessible via phone and email to my clients for up to 10 hours. In addition to being on site the day of the wedding I also am at the rehearsal This timeline allows me to really get to know the bride and also troubleshoot any issues that may arise-I am there to orchestrate the event, and while there are some planning choices that I may not have recommended in the end it is the bride and groom’s day and the wedding should reflect who they are.
I have never had an experience where a guest thought I did a bad job, quite the opposite in fact. Many times I have family members come up to me at the wedding and say, thank goodness you were here or you were such a lifesaver the last few weeks. And other guests have asked for my card for their future events. I don’t think the concept of Day of Coordination (which lets be real it is never just Day Of) is bad. The problem are the people out there that because they planned their own wedding think they are now wedding planners and charge a miniscule amount so they can build their portfolio. Instead of starting their own business they should assist an established planner and see what the business side is all about, not everyone is made out to be an entrepreneur but there is a need for some really good planning assistants out there!
I agree more with Robyn than with Jordan – I don’t think the “Day Of” package needs to be wiped out in it’s entirety. I do believe the title is misleading, as we all know it’s not just the one day.
As a wedding photographer and someone who also runs one of Canada’s most popular wedding blogs, when it came to planning my own wedding recently, I knew I could do most of it but would need a “Day Of” package. In fact, it was the first thing I did. I didn’t need a planner to do everything, I didn’t need help finding vendors, I didn’t need help finding good deals, I didn’t need help with my budget, etc etc. I also didn’t want the “Pay as you go” options that some planners provide. My needs were caught between the options provided. I needed someone to basically take over the week prior, and the day of. And that’s exactly what my planner did, and I’m INSANELY grateful for it.
I don’t think we need to abolish that package – I can’t be the only bride that had these specific needs. I do think the “day of” package should be produced in a more specific and realistic way, which helps all areas of the industry, including keeping expectations of being a wedding planner itself for those that are considering it.
I’m not sure why planners assume they have lost all control over a wedding when it is a MOC. We have parameters in place and ask a ba-jillion questions from vendor selection to decor to location etc. It is even stipulated in our agreement that vendors need to be approved by us. In addition, the service is NOT inexpensive. therefore weeding out the gym weddings right out the gate.
Some of our most memorable weddings have been MOC’s. Our brides are just as anal and Type A as us, that is why they are so happy to be able to turn over the details to like-minded people to manage one of the most expensive and important days of their lives.
I question you: if control over producing an event that is matching to your brand and reputation is the most important thing, how much control do you REALLY have with full or partial services?
Our clients are very involved with all of our weddings, even full, and they make the final decisions. I remember one full service wedding I literally begged we get a tent for the outdoor reception, in the very least to cover the band. It was not a financial issue, the bride simply hated tents. When the sky to ground lightening came and quarter size hail washing out the $12k in decor …. she looked at me and knew she made a critical error. Still a great wedding because what makes a fabulous wedding is not flowers, cake or uplighting …. it’s the people. The open bar helped.
My point, in this instance, even though we were involved from the very beginning….our clients ultimately control who they want to hire and where they want to spend THEIR money. And being financially wealthy does not mean you automatically have superb taste.
Bottom line: if you are going to offer MOC services, then have as many steps in place so you won’t be taking on a disaster. Just getting rid of them isn’t always the answer depending on your market. And charge what you are worth.
And please do not gloss over “maybe you needed more income to stay afloat”. That is a REAL ISSUE and should not be taken lightly. When your entire household is self-employed …. my mortgage company could care less whether or not I have sold to my “target bride”. Bills are due. We can’t eat charger plates.
I agree and I don’t. As a Wedding Planner, Day of Packages have been my saving grace as far as paying the bills, and there absolutely is a need to have a coordinator on the day of the wedding to deal with any issues. On the other hand you are sooooo right, it’s silly to hire someone for the Day of the Weddign when they would be much better equipped if they were there all along. Offering Day of Packages is the most horrible way to ruin your reputation and it is by far the hardest thing to do in the industry. You are basically dumped with all the mistakes and problems and responsible for dealing with all of it. It certainly does have a place though, and for a low budget wedding where the couple really doesn’t have the budget to have a wedding planner, Day of Coordination does remove a lot of stress from the couple and their family on the Wedding day. It is also(as a Wedding Planner) the best way to get my foot in the door and learn which vendors are good and not good. These couples who have planned their own wedding, have allowed their wedding to be a testing ground for these vendors to save money, and it certainly comes with a price.
This year, I took Day of Wedding Coordination off my website(because as you mentioned, it’s not reflecting the business brand that I have worked so hard to achieve) but would still take on a day of, if I wasn’t booked that day. I don’t think it ruining the industry in any way though. It may be hurting the Wedding Planners reputation more than anything.
I’m torn on this one. On one hand, I think that Jordan has a HUGE point – and there is a very real risk that comes with “Day Of”, both for the Planner and for the client.
I’ve noticed that here in the Calgary market, more and more Planners are moving towards re-naming the “Day of” service to “Month Of”. That’s what we’ve done, because it’s simply not realistic to assume that we can waltz in the day of a wedding and manage it smoothly. At least – not the way WE prefer to manage weddings! I also find that I am much more confident charging a realistic fee for this service when I call it what it truly is.
I think that there are many, many Planners out there who under-value themselves when it comes to this specific service, and THAT has to stop.
I think that there IS a place for “Month of” services – most of our “Month of” clients could never, ever afford our full planning + design services, so it’s not as though they are simply choosing a lesser service. I personally enjoy them, to a point. It keeps me on my toes and allows me to enjoy the experience in different way than with my full planning + design clients. Having said that – I will probably phase them out of our services as our full planning + design services are just too much in demand now, so it won’t be practical for us to continue offering this unless I have jr. associate planners handle it.
I do worry often about having Lavish associated with weddings that aren’t up to the design standard that people expect from us – however, we don’t market those weddings (we don’t post photos of them, they aren’t included in our portfolios etc) so the risk is small. The worst we’ve had to deal with has been working with sub-par vendors – but because we come in somewhat early in the process, we are usually able to lay down the law, so-to-speak, about what our on-site expectations are on behalf of the client. Our clients still get the “Lavish Experience” – our service philosophy is the same whether you are full planning or “month of” – and THAT is what they tell their friends about, THAT is what their guests experience.
Like I said – I’m torn.
I’d be more interested in finding a way to regulate the industry as a whole – nationally or internationally- mandatory training, mandatory professional designations, all of which would push the credibility of the industry up a few notches and put an end to those who wake up after planning their own wedding and decided that they ARE a wedding planner and start planning weddings for $500 a pop.
Getting off my soapbox now
Can’t tell you how pleased I am at all the thoughtful comments with different perspectives.
One cannot find universal-agreement-on-standards in any category of the wedding industry. Each company owner has some non-negotiable standards they will stand up against.
On smaller levels, in the DJ industry, I had a few things I would not bend on, no matter what. For example, we would always be set up, and ready to go, before the doors opened, regardless of the fact that a client had hired live music during dinner. You can’t set up during a meal, and yes, you have to charge for early set up. That was it… period.
I would not send my staff to venues that did not comply with ADA access. I remember the Corinthian Yacht Club in Tiburon. I worked there once, in 1978. Three flights of stair; no elevator. The property was grandfathered in, out-of-compliance with ADA restrictions, because it physically impossible to put in an elevator. That was fine, but I wouldn’t send people there if they paid my company triple.
There is a delicate balance between working within a financial limitation, understanding the clients wishes and preferences, and doing a professional job the meets or exceeds expectations. There is sales, not just in getting the job, but in helping a client understand how all the elements of an event work together. A wedding planner does the ultimate balancing act in keeping these factors in alignment.
In a perfect world, every bride would hire a qualified wedding planner.
In a reasonable world, every bride that can afford a qualified wedding planner, should hire one.
I would like to see weddings move toward a reasonable world where competent, qualified wedding planners are in ample supply and brides understand the importance of hiring them.
Sounds good to me!!
Andy
In the perfect world, it would be great if all couples could hire planners from beginning to end, but considering that wedding planners used to be only hired by the rich and famous, I think we’ve come along way to get the average working couple to invest in our services.
There is no such thing as a “day-of” coordinator, as you just don’t walk into an event and hope for the best. Over the years, we’ve found that a two-month out package works the best for those that have hired all of their own vendors and realize that they do need someone on the day of to manage the event. Once we go through all of their details and start making adjustments, corrections, etc. they are thankful that they hired us.
Unlike some others, we do work with new vendors all the time, and when we contact them to reconfirm their time, services, etc. we can tell from the efficiency and timeliness of their response if we need to be more ‘”on top of” them than others. During this time we also make our expectations of the day clear and when they see our very detailed timeline they also appreciate our professionalism and know they are working with someone that is “on it.”
We do have quite a few talented and artsy brides that do want to do a lot of their own planning, so we developed “partnership” packages whereby we can suggest them to vendors that are the most appropriate to their style, budget, needs, etc. This has been our most popular package and has worked out well on both sides.
I also prefer to work with clients from beginning to end as I get to know more about their personalities, temperaments, likes, don’t likes, family situations, cultures, hobbies, etc. that can help to personalize their event. We’ve started a “First Two” promotion to help promote this package and prompt quick attention…..basically the first two that book it within a given month get a great savings on an already value-added package. In the long run, it will save us a lot of time in the planning so I feel it is worth it.
At the end of day, my goal is that everyone has a great Hawaii wedding. We not only offer internships for those that are interested in our industry, and have students from an event management class work with us on events a couple of times a year, but we have actually had other wedding coordinators work with us on some events to sharpen their skills which in turn would better service their clients.
When we train, we go back to “basics” and even have them physically setting up tables and lining up chairs to create that perfectly aligned aisle. Learning to lock the legs of the table, understanding what size linen they need, the lumps and bumps of the ground they are dealing with, how much time it takes to unload the SUV, install, etc.
Some think that I am crazy to train someone that could be my competition, but I personally think there is enough business out there and not enough truly qualified planners to service it. As my mentors took the time out of their busy schedule to train me “the right way” I feel it is my obligation to share my knowledge with others.
I hope what I describe does not come off as pompous or disrespectful of those who truly believe “Day of” is a waste…I hope you will read my “rebuttal” and understand, I do handle this with my staff of 20..I teach and certify planners from all over the world. It’s honestly the only time I can use my college background “to teach”. I work with several community colleges in the tri-state and I also sign off on the students hours as interms. I am only mentioning this for those who do not know me or what I do with regard to education…I am a designer..Not an orchestrator.
How can a trained planner..or one who maybe started in the corp side of events..and sales people/events/kickoffs/tradeshows etc, start on the personal events if they do not master the “day of??”…That is the MOST essential package and most commonly used.
Who on earth would want to manage their wedding day? I understand the DIY bride..I see her everyday. She calls us usually frantic only weeks before the wedding showing us her year supply of Xanax..I did not plan one portion of my wedding..I did not have a vision..I wanted pink hair and people that cut hair upside down to perform..That was not a wedding LOL..I let my vendors take over.
I got drunk..I kicked off my shoes..Hit my hubbies guests in the head (first dance) with one shoe (maybe it was not an accident)…and I continued to drink as my father mentioned things you only wish you could hear about ones childhood…It wasn’t funny… My “Day of Planner” was not a employee it was a peer…and I cannot thank her enough for handling what I call chaos..and family dynamics..UGH..
She saved me from doing things that would have made me…I have no words.
I think those who charge the appropriate amounts for “Day of” can make a decent living. If one charged $2500 which is average for my team..Not me..2 times a month..Is $60,000 a bad living? No..I did not include tips, if they choose to work on commissions..I do not usually do this personally..That allows for more..I also hire planners that do more than plan..some can add calligraphy, some can get travel inexpensively, thermography for addressing or stuffing envelopes…Do you see a pattern here?
“Day of” is just a name..no one uses all of it …In-fact, I am dumping the name as it’s not the true meaning..I customize what we need to look like on the day and before the day..”Blue Printing” as initials for every single ask..a check list…..allows for NO mistakes with regard to expectations and various other asks etc..on both our/their end…
What about hourly consulting? Why is this not being used? You can charge up to $1000 an hour…depending on your background..Maybe more..? This is INVALUABLE…why? Because your client who doesn’t understand quality and goes for the “deal” to meet her budget is going to FAIL in one category aka vendor hire maybe 3 or all.. Some do fine.. Most don’t.
I will say that 90%…(Note..these are our stats with my company not across the US)..150-200 events annually…Some brides…sign for consulting packages especially the DIY bride..and we will honor a retro “Day of” via addendum..They take this 9 out of 10 times..Once they see the stress (They have someone who knows what is going on)…They find that extra $1000 or more trust me..This really is valuable..More than you could possibly imagine unless you are a planner who does well with this and I see that many do (here and elsewhere).
You are making a BIG mistake by even asking/considering to take it off…Try it and see what happens…The economy and telling those to “dump” it….Well who is going to pay their bills when no one can afford the other programs? You have to ask for what you are worth..
You cannot discount planning it’s not tangible…You do the same work….too much? Do less work…Work smarter not harder”…You will come out ahead and referrals..take a number with a smile
I can see a very useful place for “Day of” wedding coordinators. I think it would be rather handy to have a person there to “pamper” or as I would prefer, slap the “bridezilla” when she needs it.
On the other hand I do believe “Day of” is an exploitation, not by the wedding planners but OF the wedding planners. It is for the bride who didn’t want to “ante” up for the full shot planner, but to feign the appearance that she is sophisticated (which by the root origin of the word is actually the very same act) to her guests. Do not misinterpret my opinions, having a wedding planner is most useful and for the couple that can afford one, not affording it would be a mistake. Having direction and purpose from someone with knowledge and the wherewithal to navigate for the bride, groom and the invasive families, is more than just a person to help you find the best vendors but referee for the couple and parents. Still I find there are many couples where having a wedding planner was more about ego than anything else. If a bride wants a planner than hire one from the beginning to do what do and that should be “soup to nuts,” including the “day of” not as an add on but as an important part of the whole process.